Feeling strong, healing inside

I find I'm having a lot of positive reflections and insights about my illness. I've grown tremendously, despite the numerous relapses into drinking. I'm on another sober stretch - planned for 5 days - and I'm preparing to start a 30 day stretch. I abstained without any difficulty last night, and my yoga session felt wonderful, as if I were cleansing away the negative images of myself and my life that linger in my mind.

I finally feel a real sense of my own worth. This is largely because I have so many people around me that continuously tell me that I'm special, wonderful, loveable, and awesome.

I try to remind myself that everything I need can be found within myself. Still, I wish I could generate such self-praise on my own, but the truth is: sometimes what I need comes from my loved ones, and it's a wonderful gift.

I believe that 2 years of yoga and antidepressant treatment, plus nurturing, loving relationships, have all contributed to my recovery. I feel that I've benefitted greatly, and I feel that a life of inner peace and sobriety is in my grasp. I no longer feel I am doomed to repeat the same cycle of abstain-relapse-despair-repeat that I lived for so long. I no longer feel hopeless.